I think it's a universal truth that this year more than any other in recent history, men and women alike were a bit more reseved when saying the requisite 'happy new year'. Very few could muster up any enthusiasm seeing the signs all around them, realizing that we are in for a hard, hard road. I'm not just referring to the spiritually enlightened, but to everyone, on every continent, and in every country. There is this feeling of unease boiling beneath the surface every where you go.
I am truly sorry for not posting in the past couple weeks. I've been in Romania for the past ten days, and I needed time to recharge my batteries, and just think for awhile. I had to come to terms with the fact that what I thought I knew concerning where I would be during the coming years, was not God's will but my own heart wanting to return to my homeland. Those of you who received the November-December-January newsletter, know what I am reffering to. Those that haven't, I'm planning on posting a dream I had in recent months as soon as I return to America. It is not an easy thing to have all your plans for the future turned on their ear, and tossed out the window like so much trash.
Each of us face the crossroads of decision in our life wherein we either say "God's will be done!" or, we take the path of disobedience and suffer the consequences thereof. I have chosen to obey, because for me there was no second option. It seems my stay in America will be longer than I had envisioned, and the work I thought was nearing its end is only just beginning. Please keep me in your prayers, I need the strength.
I guess the most heartbreaking aspect of this is that many will receive the truth only upon staring into the chasm, on the edge of the abyss with all their security blankets ripped from them and made inconsequential. We fight the good fight rejoicing in the small victories, in the one heart among the many who will humble itself and receive Christ, in the one church among the thousands that returns to the basic principles of the faith searching after God in prayer and supplication. I'm rambling; my heart is heavy.
Thank you all for your understanding and for your prayers. The journey continues, the narrow path is before us, and we press ever onward toward the prize.
With love in Christ,
Michael Boldea Jr.
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14 comments:
Michael,
This post is absolutely correct. It feels hypocritical to say Happy new year. better yet Empty. For us happiness is not here, We rejoice in Hope of the kingdom of God. How can we be happy knowing the judgement to come on those around us. Apostle Paul said "sorrowful yet rejoicing".
your second point about where you are now must be more common than we think. I was told in a dream about 3 years ago to live move to a specific place yet have not been able to sell my house or have the finances to do so. Our Lord must have extended the time again to show mercy to this nation. My home is about to be foreclosed unless the Lord steps in and brings a buyer. I have my home for sale about 50% of value yet here I am.
you are not alone. Hang tough, I believe the Lord is testing the righteous , sifting us so that we may be worthy of His protection later. Our Faith must remain as we have seen nothing as of yet. If we are week now what will we do later?
In Christ Jesus
Scott Hickman
Thank you for your obedience to our Lord.
I always quickly read what you and David (Wilkerson) write. Neither of you are afraid to be honest with where God is leading.
I'll keep you in my prayers.
Your post hints at a leason the Lord has been teaching me lately.
I watched an old 1960's movie the other night about nuclear bombs hitting numerous cities around the world (Panic at the year zero). The focus of the movie was about the breakdown in society; people willing to do things they never did before when the world was "civilized". I also watched a documentary about the aftermath of Katrina and how people were willing to cross their moral boundaries to survive.
I pray that the Lord will stengthen us and keep us in remembrance of our need to obey Him, no matter what the cost. It's so easy to justify our actions under terrible circumstances.
I'm fearful of what others will do to me and my family during these times. I'm much more fearful of what I might do in disobedient to the Lord.
God help us,
Jeff
Dear Michael,
Your pain and perhaps disappointment at not been in the place you wanted to go so much bleeds through this posting. I thank you for your openness and for being a true disciple, who puts away his desires in exchange for the Lord's, even when it causes you so much grief. In the end, the joy of the Lord will be yours knowing you are exactly where he wanted you to be.
In His Grace,
joyce
For the past week my heart has been heavy also, but for a different reason as it concerns my own backyard.
Today alone adds to my discomfort, as I met with 2 different pastors individually. One accidently at a restraunt and the other at a planned meeting.
They both agreed that it's ashame that the "churches" can't come together and that the "churches" are too busy pointing fingers at each other while back biting them at the same time. Then they accused each other of lacking salvation.
A third church in the past 3 weeks became upset, due to some church members helping a family from another county who had no heat or food, without the nod of approval from the pastor, though he had been contacted prior of the need with no respond to the situation till the following Sunday.
2 other ministies have embraced new age teachings and has turned the truth into a comfort zone with "music to draw them in," it looked more like a rock concert and sideshow at a carnaval.
Another minister has had a dream, showing that all the ministries are going to come together in 2009 embracing each other and that the elected governmental officials and judicial system are all going to be saved. Thus a couple of doctors, lawyers and this minister has started a multi-religious incorporated program that many patients are being referred to. It is religious friendly and safe to not step on religious toes or to offend any religion that is not Christian. (Sounds like a one world religion dream to me.)
On and on I can go, but my heart still remains heavy.
To get the ministries to come together, you have to serve food and coffee, tea, or soda. But don't ask for us to pray together for our community, other than to bless the food that is going to be consumed.
As a hospital chaplain, I have found more contraints being placed on me to be actually affective to the peoples needs, "be careful about witnessing," let alone being asked to pray without the name of Jesus, thus I am waiting to be asked to eventually resign my post of 12 years, due to non-compliance.
It feels as if I am standing alone with no voice to speak, let alone speak to anyone with ears to hear, so I thank you for allowing me to take this time and use my fingers to speak my heart.
Please pray for me and my community.
Michael, I'm new to the ministry the Father has given you but I feel the connection in the Spirit. The phase that comes to my mind is radical obedience. I feel the call of my saviour bidding me to this kind of life. Scary, isn't it. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about but I say all of this to encourage you that the body of Christ is rising together in this time. Be strong in Christ!
Well Mike, I will wish you a very Happy New Year!
I'm sorry that your desire to go back to Romania must be put away. I know how you feel, but the Holy Spirit brought this to mind when reading your post:
"When I was a child, I spoke as a child, but when I got older, I put away childish things" and "babes in Christ drink the milk of the word, but those who are mature eat meat." (both parapharased, of course). You see, anyone can drink milk, even straight from the animal if you like, but to eat meat, blood must be shed, sacrifice must be made.
You made the correct choice to obey and God will bless you for it. He has revealed your maturity by telling you something once, expecting you to obey, unlike a child that must be constantly reminded.
Your brother, Doug
God will bless you, brother Michael, for you have traveled a weary road trying to open the eyes and ears of so many who put their trust in the American illusion. Someday He will say to you, "Well done thou good and faithful servant" and it will all have been worth the effort. With much love, your sister in Christ,
Michael:
I am so sorry for the deep disappointment you are experiencing regarding Yahveh's guiding hand upon your life. Please know that your call, your ministry, is a source of comfort and inspiration to me, although I seldom reach out to you via mail. Keep your head up, and keep pushing forward. Please also pray for me, that I may be given soul healing and a willing and obedient spirit that I would follow Him in everything.
All the best, Cale H
Michael my brother,
I feel the Lord our God, praise His Holy Name has a message for you. I'm hesitant to use this phrase bcause its a phrase that I would not normally use but I'll put it out there as I have heard it. " Rock on my good and faithful servant "
Thank you Michael for serving our Lord. It has been a blessing for so many and I'm sorry you can't go home yet. But we love you here too and I hope you will feel that love and come to know your home is where you are my friend.
God Bless you and yours!!!
Dear Michael,
While sympathizing deeply with your disappointment over having to remain in this Sodom-and-Gomorrah of a country, I must admit that I am personally rejoicing to know we will have you with us awhile longer! This gives me great hope and encouragement that the Lord is going to do mighty works on behalf of the faithful on this continent, even in the midst of tribulation. Glory to His name! We love you, Michael. Take heart! Our prayers for your strengthening are rising continuously to heaven like incense.
Melanie
Thank you for your obedience to Jesus Brother. That's what called for in this dark hour. As for me, I had no intention to be in the capital city of Babylon but it's been the Lord's design for me.
Not my will, but thy will be done! That's glory and pain all at the same time. Thank you for your encouragement...
Dear brother Michael,
I am sorry to hear about your disappointed expectation and hope that you were going home to Romania soon. I will lift you up. I am experiencing the same kind of disappointment - having to stay in a place that I was sure the Father had released me from and was making a way for me to leave. I know several other believers in the same situation, so this must be part of His plan. I don't know what He's waiting for, but it must be important. Maybe it's part of the bigger picture of wanting us to be ready to go, ready to leave everything and not look back, and remaining in that state of readiness no matter how long He delays.
Amy
Sorry but I just now read this post...Well I must say I am so glad that your staying here..I am even further from my homeland than you are (New Zealand)and I wasn't so happy when I origonally came here and went back after 3 1/2 years. I have been in America now since 1979. I have learned that my homeland is heaven, and I am just a sojourner on this earth on a mission for my Master, as you are. I know what it is to initally feel "home sick" so I can empathize with you young brother Michael.
Now you don't have to post this unless you wish to.
I woke up last night thinking about you and the Lord showed me that you've been in a struggle. I am not trying to be all prophetic-E-ish here just telling you that the Lord let me feel your heaviness and your struggles.
Only-absoulutely only-- those things done here on this earth for God's Glory-Count for anything. Riches, Education, Affulence, Influence, a great name, a great family, nothing matters all is vanity. None of those things makes us any better in God's eyes. Anything we are anything we have is God's doing, God's giftings for His Glory.
People make God's of Riches, Education,Family etc. God must come first. We must pour all our energy into doing for Him, giving ourselves to Him regardless of how we feel.
The Lord taught me something a long time ago, that I have to keep remembering- Our lives were not given so that we may enjoy them, but rather that we may learn to endure that which is set before us.
I love you brother Michael, your in my prayers. Stay strong in the Lord set yourself.
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