Job CLVII

 Job 14:13-17, “Oh, that You would hide me in the grave, that You would conceal me until Your wrath is past, that You would appoint me a set time, and remember me! If a man dies, shall he live again? All the days of my hard service I will wait, till my change comes. You shall call and I will answer You; You shall desire the work of Your hands. For now You number my steps, but do not watch over my sin. My transgression is sealed up in a bag, and You cover my iniquity.”

It’s awe-inspiring to witness a man grapple with his inner turmoil, battling his instincts and senses, rising above despair and hopelessness, and reaching out to the only One he knows can provide comfort. Job’s response to Zophar and his plea to God is a testament to the courage found in vulnerability, in admitting the struggle we often try to mask with a brave face.

I deflect with humor. I always have, ever since I came to realize what I was doing, especially in uncomfortable situations or circumstances where merely the idea of confronting the pain is so unfathomable that I would rather ignore it for as long as I can.

Job had no such outlet. He didn’t try to deflect the pain he was feeling but poured himself out with all the pent-up frustration, fear, pain, and grief that he was feeling.

Being vulnerable with God is not a weakness. On the contrary, pouring one’s heart out to Him, crying out to Him, being honest, sincere, and even painfully so about the hurt one is feeling and the hardship they are going through demonstrates one’s awareness of their own limitations.

If I am broken, I can’t fix myself. If I have reached the end of my tether, by definition, there is nothing I can do of my own agency to get me out of a situation or predicament. Yes, we endure, yes, we press on, yes, we persevere and keep moving forward, but the hope of being made whole again must be tethered in God and His ability to do so rather than our own strength and resolve.

We can only white knuckle it through pain for so long. Eventually, without the aid, comfort, and healing presence of God, we will be crushed and ground into the dust of the earth, no matter how valiantly we attempt to carry on.

Job was aware of his limitations. He understood that there was nothing he could do but cry out to God, plead with Him, and cling to the hope that the goodness of God would prevail in his situation. Job was not picky about how his resolution would come about as long as it did. In his current state, the only remedy he saw was to go to the grave because our intellect often limits our willingness to hope for a miracle. We are told that something or other is impossible for so long that we come to believe it, ignoring the reality that nothing is impossible with God.

Throughout my years in ministry, I’ve found it telling that certain trials last only so long as it takes for the individual in question to abandon all hope in themselves, their abilities, and their resilience and rest their hope fully in the Lord.

Some of us must be stripped of the illusion that projecting strength is itself a form of strength. We’ve all encountered fake tough guys who talk big, but wilt at the first sign of pushback, and the reaction to such individuals is universal. True strength is not boastful, arrogant, or given to displays of grandiosity. As is often the case, those who talk big do little, and eventually, their shortcomings, inadequacies, and weaknesses come to the fore and are on full display for everyone to see.

Men can choose to stand in their own strength or stand in the strength that originates from God, something beyond their agency or ability. Those who stand in their strength discover the frailty of it eventually, some only doing so when they’ve exhausted themselves trying to do on their own what only God can do. It is a form of pride, I think, beating our chests and declaring how powerful we are in and of ourselves. As Scripture points out, God resists the proud while giving grace to the humble.

Looking back on my own life, with the benefit of hindsight, I can attest that there are innumerable instances where only the strength of God carried me, and nothing I could have done on my own would have sufficed. You can have the hosts of hell arrayed against you, but if God remains on your side, victory is certain because God is able to do what man cannot.

What could Job have done of his own volition to improve his lot and his situation? What could he have done to heal his broken body, restore his possessions, and return to the life he’d once lived? Absolutely nothing. The best he could manage was a potsherd with which to scrape himself, and eventually, even that became burdensome because the sores were painful, and he could no longer do it.

Standing in our own strength is a toxic mix of hubris, pride, and utter futility. Especially when going through a trial, a sifting, or a season of hardship, the best course of action is to lean ever more on God and acknowledge our frailty, knowing that He has strength in abundance and is ever willing to imbue us with it if we humble ourselves and ask it of Him. We have not because we ask not, and when we do ask, some of us ask amiss, hoping to deal with the symptom of something rather than the underlying cause.

There is no advanced warning system for trials. They come unexpectedly and unbidden, seemingly out of nowhere, with all the ferocity of a category-five hurricane. There is no escape, no circumventing them or putting them off until you have less to deal with in your day-to-day life. They come, and the only option you have is to go through them. The only choice you have is whether to go through your trial alone, in your own strength, or with God by your side, drawing strength from Him and standing firm in His promises.  

With love in Christ,

Michael Boldea, Jr.